That is going to be different for every person. I have a friend that golf. She spends hours a day practicing, preparing for trips, buying golf clothes. I assume it brings her pleasure mixed with a bit of frustration and pain. However, as a widow she aware of the little things that bring daily pleasure.
Many of us rush through life taking extraordinarily little enjoyment out of any of it. I am going to list five things that bring me pleasure daily. Pleasure is so often connected with intimacy that we look at the word as if it was dirty.
1-Waking up. This is not a given. I had a near death time in May of 2022 and that day I woke up not knowing if I would live. I don't take the new day for granted nor should anyone. I like how I feel when I wake up and feel my body sort of opening for the day. I am conscious of feeling rested and happy for a new day. I take pleasure in how it feels to be alive.
2-I like feeling the pressure of my dog on my body as she continues to sleep. Francine is not
a morning hound. I deprive a great deal of pleasure from my dogs. I have some guilt I had to overcome. My Dad would often point out single women or a childless couple with dogs and comment how they are using a pet to fill an emotional need a person should be filling. I think that is true in some way. I was an oldest child and used to caring for things. Taking care of my pets fills a need. However, it also brings me a great deal of pleasure. Touching them, looking at them, gives me a sense of pride and happiness. I have an Instagram account for them so I can preserve my time with them. It is something that I derive pleasure from. And I am not saying pets are right for everyone. They are not. Some people do not want to be tied down. Pleasure comes from knowing yourself and your needs,
3-Breathing. That sounds considerably basic. I found out it is not. if suddenly you cant breath, that shit becomes important. Most people will go about their entire day unaware of their breath unless something catches them by surprise, or they have sex, or they are sick and can’t breathe or they get short of breath. So, during the day I am aware of my breath, and I take pleasure in my body being able to pull in energy and use it. This is especially true if I go outside. I like to take in the clean air and the smells. It brings deep pleasure to me body and quiets my mind.
I also often go to this sutra:
Radiant one, this experience may dawn between two breaths. After the breath
comes in(down) and just before turning up(out)—the beneficence.
This is the sutra I use for my own personal work. I am not saying it is the best. It is just the one I respond to understand most closely and innately. It is the sutra that led Buddha to Buddhahood. I am keenly aware of the air coming into my nose dropping down deeply into my body pausing and then flowing outward.
4- Taking a bath. I rarely shower. I like to take baths and I do not like to be rushed. I like the feel of the water on my body, and I like to use salt or sugar scrubs to keep my skin clean and moisturized. The pleasure and the stimulation are good for the body. Our skin is responsible for detoxing our body almost as much as our liver. It is important to keep it healthy.
5-Taking in Beauty: Lift your head and look for the beauty around you. Even in the oddest spots we can find something beautiful, such as a ladybug crawling across a leaf.
Pleasure involves each of our senses, taste, touch, hearing, sight, smell. Engage with each of your senses and bring awareness to them. You might notice I did not mention eating as a pleasure, because that is reserved for a profound experience. Once a week I go out to eat and have a meal that I can sit and enjoy and take my time eating and chatting with people and really focus on how good the food is. Often at home I do not take the time to focus on the pleasure of eating, so it is a special pleasure for me when I go out.
These are totally personal pleasures, and they might be quite different for you. It is a matter of getting to know what makes you feel good. No matter our circumstances, we can find pleasure in our lives just by bringing awareness to our daily routines and activities.
I know that I am at a stage in my life where I have a lot of time to do this. But I began this practice 30 years ago when I had 4 kids at home and a miserable husband, and the finances were all over the place.
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